can i move on?

I just want to find the right words to tell you that I want to move on, I want to be happy, I want to let you go, but I’m still trying to figure out where we went wrong. When did it all fall apart? I really believed that this was something worth fighting for, but somewhere along the way I was proven wrong. I think what’s worse than losing someone, is not knowing why you lost them, and  i honestly don't know how and when do i lost you?


 

There’s going to be weak days where i lay there and cry at the mistake i made. I will regret losing you, go through your pictures that i still have saved and punish myself for ruining everything we had. I will try to avoid texting you, either by deleting your number or thinking of how utterly blunt you are when you reply.

There will also be days where i feel strong. I feel as if i can move on, i don’t need to talk to you and even thinking of you just reminds me of how much you are holding me back. The days where i feel like i’m done with you and i don’t care anymore. But i do. And even though i know i am not completely moved on, i do know that i am getting stronger everyday and soon i will be happy again.
I can’t wait to find someone who made me feel the way you made me feel, you were truly amazing. I don’t want to forget you. I won’t let that happen, you will always be in my heart. Now i have started to see that i can move on, will move on, and that’s good.

                            honestly I don’t know how I lost you